So, it's December 31st and I am ready for a new start. Going to give this blogging thing another chance...
Here's the 60-second synopsis of our September (3rd IVF) cycle...
Donor's cycle was off-the-charts: 42 follicles, 28 eggs, 22 mature, lots fertilized, ended up with 17 viable embryos. Transferred 2, froze 15
The Tests: First beta had us excited. It was 240 at 9dp5dt and kept rising 150% the first several betas. E2 and P4 started strong too. Finally - maybe, just maybe, success!
The Night Before My U/S: IVF women are crazy - we'll try almost anything if we hear it worked for someone else. Spin around three times clockwise and three counter-clockwise right after your feet touch the floor in the morning? I can do that! Only clip your fingernail when the moon is 1/4 full and rising in the southwest? Why not? As time goes on, the suggested remedies get more extreme: Hang dried moose poop over our bed for 30-nights? No problem! Drink a concoction that tastes like a combination of mustard and peanut butter? Sign me up!
Yes - I had tried accupuncture - got a BFN - then got a BFP on my subsequent cycle without acupuncture, then went back to acupuncture for this latest cycle and got a BFP. Did acupuncture have anything to do with it? Not sure...but don't think so.
One day, I came across an interview with a leading hypnofertility specialist. A couple months later, I read a blog written by a woman who had been through 6 IVFs and cycled at my clinic. She saw this same hypnofertility expert and her 7th IVF cycle was finally "THE ONE". Not only that, but this specialist was right here, in my own hometown! BINGO!!!! It's definitely a sign and ssomething I can do to finally take control!!!
So, we shelled out another mini-mountain of money for four sessions. I used three and still had one left...again, maybe this was meant to be! The night before my u/s, as she put me into a relaxing trance, I swear I could feel the baby inside of me. I was 100% positive we would see a miracle on the u/s screen in a little over 12 hours later. I went to bed dreaming of the baby growing inside me.
The End: Like before, P4 started dropping. Doctor S was not worried and even told me "You "ARE" going to have this baby." By the time we got to the first ultrasound, the heartbeat was so faint that only the u/s tech could see it. They told me to stay on the drugs one more week - just to be sure. This week was worse than anything I had experienced in my life. Each day the tears flowed freely just waiting for it to be over already. I finally had a D&C on November 3.
The hormones and disappointment was so bad that I cried constantly for about 3 more weeks - until one day there were no more tears left. Then, I went to Italy for two weeks...and indulged - woke up late every morning, ate pasta or pizza every day, lingered in the museums.
A la "Under the Tuscan Sun" and "Eat, Pray, Love", what is it about Italy (especially Tuscany) that helps American women begin to heal their spirit and rediscover life? I'm sure the pear and ricotta ravioli in creme sauce and a daily dose of gellato didn't hurt!
What's happened since?
I guess IVF is like baseball and court - they go by the 3-strike rule. Women have to suffer through 3 miscarriages before the insurance companies will take you seriously and pay for testing. Never mind the years and years of therapy it will take us to get over our "broken" bodies! Grrrrr!
What might be different if women were the CEO's of insurance companies - espeically a couple that have travelled this road only to find failure? Ok...rant for another day...
Getting back to the story, we tested the tissue of our last fetus and it came back as a normal female. I know some of you are thinking - normal female doesn't mean a conclusive result because it was probably my own tissue. Whether that's the case or not - I am going to trust my geneticist (whom I adore) and believe in my mind that the test was conclusive.
Next, they ran a full thrombophilia panel on me. My results showed positive for MTHFR genes (with normal homocystine - which means that the MTHFR shouldn't have an effect on pregnancy) and positive for Lupus Anticoagulant.
In a nutshell, this means that the nutrition a placenta needs to sustain itself isn't getting where it needs to be. In simpler terms - my fetus' are being smothered and starved to death.
My geneticist said that if I were his daughter, he'd advise me to give it one more shot but, if it doesn't work - think about another way to find our children. In one meeting, Dr. S said that he didn't believe in autoimmune issues, but he's willing to put me on Lovenox (a blood thinner) for one more try. In a subsequent meeting, I related the "one more shot" theory to him and he said - you're giving up much easier than me. You 've got lots of frosties and that will give you lots of tries. HELLO?!!! REMEMBER THERE'S A BODY WE PUMP FULL OF DRUGS ATTACHED TO THE UTERUS!!! NOT TO MENTION THE EVER-SHRINKING BANK ACCOUNT!!!
Where are we today?
We've decided to give it one more shot with a two-embryo FET cycle scheduled for January 21.
I could have cycled on the 18th, but the 21st is a Friday (so don't have to explain to work about taking off to do bedrest again) and it was my Grandfather's birthday (he passed several years ago).
I was on BCPs since December 9th, started back on a daily pre-natal vitamin and baby aspirin (will be on the aspirin for the rest of my life due to my clotting issues), added two daily super-chared B4, B6, B12, and Folate pills. Started Lupron shots in mid-December.
My AF arrived right on time, so all systems are go to really start getting into gear on New Year's Day - decrease lupron to 5mg tomorrow and start on estrogen patches.
Emotionally, I'm really struggling with getting excited about this cycle. I feel like I'm going through the motions...
Like most women going through IVF, I've become obsessive and need to have a plan for the future. So, my husband and I started taking action in December.
We attended a foster-care orientation and that only further convinced me that I am not foster-care-parent material. Still, we are going to go through the training because it can only increase our knowledge to become parents.
I also convinced my husband to start going back to church on Sundays. I'd describe my own beliefs as somewhere between atheist and agnostic -but have no objections to raising our child catholic as long as my husband bears the brunt of the responsibility. To get him started, I agreed to go to church with him. After Church, he sat down with a deacon to ask what the procedure was to join the parrish (from what we got out of our conversation, all you have to do is fill out a form and you're in).
Eventually, the conversation quickly turned to children and we mentioned that we've struggled to start our family (without giving details). The deacon turned to us and said "I think I can help! We have anatural family planning class starting early next year that teaches you things like how to time your relations." An angel must have been sitting on my shoulder that day because I think I was successful in hiding my hysterical laughter! That one goes down with the doctor who asks a long-time infertility patient how she plans to handle birth control after she finally decides to call it quits!
We did meet with an adoption attorney who is very experienced in our state and he gave us hope. He referred us to another private adoption agency and we met with the director yesterday. It costs a fortune - but what doesn't in this business, right?
I haven't admitted this to anyone yet, but I am more confident about working with this agency than about my upcoming FET cycle. My husband and I agreed that we're going to submit our applicatoin next week - no matter what happens.
I can't help but think that Murphy's Law will come into play and we'll end up pregnant as we go through the adoption process (maybe even with twins - in which case we'll withdraw our application)...fingers crossed that we'll be so lucky.
A toast to 2011! Cheers!
Friday, December 31, 2010
Friday, July 30, 2010
Have Almost Two Weeks Have Passed? Really?
For those of you waiting to cycle and feel like it takes forever, start a blog! I can hardly believe it's been over 15 days since my last post! The time is just flying!
In the world of IVF, not much has been happening. Was just waiting on my AF - which I think finally arrived late this afternoon. Next week should be an exciting one - my first time getting a calendar with some dates! The nurse wanted my cycle to start about a week before my donor's but it sounds like we might have done that naturally now. Not sure if that's good, bad or neutral.
So, this time I really do want to write about twins.
I follow two different message boards pretty closely with women who are all at various stages of the process. Seems like lately, there have been lots and lots of twin announcements.
When I first started this process, I was hoping for twins. Knowing that my husband and I are older, we agreed that as soon as we have our baby / babies, that would be it - no more pregnancies for me. I have two labs, and although I realize kids are very different, that was easy. So, I thought that if I have one newborn, how much harder can two ore even three be? Sounded like the perfect plan. In fact, during my last DE process, I convinced the RE to put back three.
After talking with my new RE and having him explain why he refuses to implant more than two DE at one time has given me a fresh perspective. As he described the increased risks and the physical and health problems he's seen over the years, I swear I could see the anguish in his eyes.
The last thing I would ever want to do would be to risk the health of my future child / children. After doing some additional reading, I have had a 180-degree shift in my attitude and am perfectly comfortable with two and no more.
I just have to trust that whatever is meant to be, is meant to be...and it is out of my hands.
In the world of IVF, not much has been happening. Was just waiting on my AF - which I think finally arrived late this afternoon. Next week should be an exciting one - my first time getting a calendar with some dates! The nurse wanted my cycle to start about a week before my donor's but it sounds like we might have done that naturally now. Not sure if that's good, bad or neutral.
So, this time I really do want to write about twins.
I follow two different message boards pretty closely with women who are all at various stages of the process. Seems like lately, there have been lots and lots of twin announcements.
When I first started this process, I was hoping for twins. Knowing that my husband and I are older, we agreed that as soon as we have our baby / babies, that would be it - no more pregnancies for me. I have two labs, and although I realize kids are very different, that was easy. So, I thought that if I have one newborn, how much harder can two ore even three be? Sounded like the perfect plan. In fact, during my last DE process, I convinced the RE to put back three.
After talking with my new RE and having him explain why he refuses to implant more than two DE at one time has given me a fresh perspective. As he described the increased risks and the physical and health problems he's seen over the years, I swear I could see the anguish in his eyes.
The last thing I would ever want to do would be to risk the health of my future child / children. After doing some additional reading, I have had a 180-degree shift in my attitude and am perfectly comfortable with two and no more.
I just have to trust that whatever is meant to be, is meant to be...and it is out of my hands.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Two for One...
No, this isn't a post about twinkies...it's that I have two items on my mind today
1. Over the weekend I was in my car and there was a fascinating story playing about how a newborn baby's brain develops:
http://www.wnyc.org/shows/radiolab/episodes/2010/05/14
I vividly recall that as a small child my senses were vastly more sensitive than they are now. I clearly remember loathing onions because they burned my tongue and how much I dreaded each Independence Day because the noise from the fireworks was too loud.
Therefore, it makes perfect sense to me that a newborn's hearing would still be developing several months after it was born.
I have also strongly believed that babies can hear sounds in-utero. This was reinforced when I did some work with Lyndsi Eastburn - a leading infertility hypnotist - who explained that when she worked with pregnant women who brought their babies to visit after the babies were born, the infants would reach for Lyndsi because they recognized her voice.
2. The second topic on my mind lately is regarding my desire to be in a state of ignorant bliss regarding our upcoming cycle.
I've been thinking lots about my cycle and how I want to get through the 2ww. Last time it was easy because I was overseas - so my mind was focused elsewhere. I hope that once I get my calendar for this cycle, I can take some time off again and distract myself.
In certain respects, today's medicine tells us too much and I think it would be better to live under the assumption of the best outcome possible. It wasn't so long ago that most women had no idea they were pregnant until they were much further along in their pregnancies.
My hope is that I can come directly out of the ET assuming this worked and immediately banish any uncertainty, doubts or negative thoughts. I am going to do my best to assume a BFP and consider the HCG blood draw as a mere formality.
This may sound nutty, but sitting here today, I almost don't want to go for a beta at all because I know that the results are totally out of my control and seeing my beta rise as my progesterone was falling during my last cycle for about eight weeks was "stress city". Don't need to go through that again!
In addition, I am going to do my best not to POAS (considering last during my last cycle, I POAS'ed on a Friday - the morning of my beta - and it negative. I assumed it was correct and didn't POAS again until Sunday - when it came back positive. On Monday, the HCG level confirmed a BFP
So, there you have it - that's the way I see it today...
1. Over the weekend I was in my car and there was a fascinating story playing about how a newborn baby's brain develops:
http://www.wnyc.org/shows/radiolab/episodes/2010/05/14
I vividly recall that as a small child my senses were vastly more sensitive than they are now. I clearly remember loathing onions because they burned my tongue and how much I dreaded each Independence Day because the noise from the fireworks was too loud.
Therefore, it makes perfect sense to me that a newborn's hearing would still be developing several months after it was born.
I have also strongly believed that babies can hear sounds in-utero. This was reinforced when I did some work with Lyndsi Eastburn - a leading infertility hypnotist - who explained that when she worked with pregnant women who brought their babies to visit after the babies were born, the infants would reach for Lyndsi because they recognized her voice.
2. The second topic on my mind lately is regarding my desire to be in a state of ignorant bliss regarding our upcoming cycle.
I've been thinking lots about my cycle and how I want to get through the 2ww. Last time it was easy because I was overseas - so my mind was focused elsewhere. I hope that once I get my calendar for this cycle, I can take some time off again and distract myself.
In certain respects, today's medicine tells us too much and I think it would be better to live under the assumption of the best outcome possible. It wasn't so long ago that most women had no idea they were pregnant until they were much further along in their pregnancies.
My hope is that I can come directly out of the ET assuming this worked and immediately banish any uncertainty, doubts or negative thoughts. I am going to do my best to assume a BFP and consider the HCG blood draw as a mere formality.
This may sound nutty, but sitting here today, I almost don't want to go for a beta at all because I know that the results are totally out of my control and seeing my beta rise as my progesterone was falling during my last cycle for about eight weeks was "stress city". Don't need to go through that again!
In addition, I am going to do my best not to POAS (considering last during my last cycle, I POAS'ed on a Friday - the morning of my beta - and it negative. I assumed it was correct and didn't POAS again until Sunday - when it came back positive. On Monday, the HCG level confirmed a BFP
So, there you have it - that's the way I see it today...
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
The Help
This past weekend, I read The Help by Katheryn Stockett. It's on all the best seller lists - so I am sure at least a few of you read it. The gist of the story is about what it was like for African American women in the 60's to work as housekeepers and child care workers for women in the South.
Although it takes place in Mississippi, I wonder how many people realize that it could have just as easily taken place in the suburbs of New York too. Although I was not raised by a housekeeper, I do remember that my mother and all of her sisters were. My grandmother was always running off somewhere - to volunteer driving the blind, shopping at the department store or visiting a friend, or playing canasta. From what my mother tells me, was rarely home to raise her four girls.
Even as I was growing up, after all the "girls" left my grandmothers house, she would have her housekeeper come several times a week. They would always be working whenever we gathered at my grandparents house for big parties or when they hosted the extended family for holidays, like Thanksgiving.
Sitting here now and wanting to start our family as bad as we do, I can't help but wonder if women who had trouble getting pregnant, and clearly didn't have access to the medical technology we have today, and were then blessed with a "miracle" still wanted the housekeeper to raise their children.
What do you think? Could you have done that?
Although it takes place in Mississippi, I wonder how many people realize that it could have just as easily taken place in the suburbs of New York too. Although I was not raised by a housekeeper, I do remember that my mother and all of her sisters were. My grandmother was always running off somewhere - to volunteer driving the blind, shopping at the department store or visiting a friend, or playing canasta. From what my mother tells me, was rarely home to raise her four girls.
Even as I was growing up, after all the "girls" left my grandmothers house, she would have her housekeeper come several times a week. They would always be working whenever we gathered at my grandparents house for big parties or when they hosted the extended family for holidays, like Thanksgiving.
Sitting here now and wanting to start our family as bad as we do, I can't help but wonder if women who had trouble getting pregnant, and clearly didn't have access to the medical technology we have today, and were then blessed with a "miracle" still wanted the housekeeper to raise their children.
What do you think? Could you have done that?
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Going to Extremes? Where does it stop?
Last night, I watched the HBO documentary Google Baby. The gist of the show was to follow a gay Israeli man who paid $140K to hire a surrogate from Tennessee to have a baby for him and his partner. After he brought home his daughter home, he took a queue from his profession (information technology) and hatched a plan to outsource surrogacy - recruit egg donors from the US, fertilize the eggs in Israel and ship the embryos to India to implant in surrogates.
While I expected this show to be uplifting and celebrating the miracles of helping people start families, it left me angry and depressed because the Indian women were severely exploited. Yes, the surrogate made a little money, but the real winners were the Israeli guy and the doctor who owned the clinic.
At the beginning, a doctor bluntly explains to a potential surrogate that she as absolutely no rights - she is simply a vessel and if there are complications (up to and including death), she has absolutely no recourse against the clinic or the adoptive family. In the next scene, they show a woman forced to have a c-section who is on the verge of tears as the baby is pulled from her stomach, put on a tray and immediately carried away to the waiting parents.
In parts of the Indian society, surrogacy is seen as taboo - one step away from prostitution. Many of these women disappear for nine months and don't tell their family or friends what they are doing - for fear of shame. They are clearly desperate to create better lives for themselves and their families. Some surrogates were clearly "seasoned" - maybe as old as in their 50's? From the moment of transfer, they live in dormitory-style rooms and are required to stay on bed rest all day as they fight boredom.
In another scene, the Israeli broker is on the phone with a 59-year-old woman who makes it clear she is financially comfortable and wants to buy donor eggs, donor sperm and hire a surrogate to have a baby. They quickly agree to work together and clearly don't care about the child and what life will be like with an older, single parent.
At the end, the Israeli "broker" was on the phone with the Indian clinic explaining that one of his clients clients wanted to implant embryos into two different surrogates at the same time. He tells the camera several times that he thinks this is wrong, yet he's talked to two different surrogacy clinics and they both think it's a wonderful idea. They don't make it clear if he went through with the plan, but my bet is that he did.
There is no question that wanting to start a family when you can't is heartbreaking. I realize that not everyone has an extra $140K sitting around, but on the other hand, after seeing this show, I do not think I that I could, in good concise, hire one of these surrogates after seeing the exploitation and heartbreak that takes place.
Hopefully, I will never have to make that decision.
While I expected this show to be uplifting and celebrating the miracles of helping people start families, it left me angry and depressed because the Indian women were severely exploited. Yes, the surrogate made a little money, but the real winners were the Israeli guy and the doctor who owned the clinic.
At the beginning, a doctor bluntly explains to a potential surrogate that she as absolutely no rights - she is simply a vessel and if there are complications (up to and including death), she has absolutely no recourse against the clinic or the adoptive family. In the next scene, they show a woman forced to have a c-section who is on the verge of tears as the baby is pulled from her stomach, put on a tray and immediately carried away to the waiting parents.
In parts of the Indian society, surrogacy is seen as taboo - one step away from prostitution. Many of these women disappear for nine months and don't tell their family or friends what they are doing - for fear of shame. They are clearly desperate to create better lives for themselves and their families. Some surrogates were clearly "seasoned" - maybe as old as in their 50's? From the moment of transfer, they live in dormitory-style rooms and are required to stay on bed rest all day as they fight boredom.
In another scene, the Israeli broker is on the phone with a 59-year-old woman who makes it clear she is financially comfortable and wants to buy donor eggs, donor sperm and hire a surrogate to have a baby. They quickly agree to work together and clearly don't care about the child and what life will be like with an older, single parent.
At the end, the Israeli "broker" was on the phone with the Indian clinic explaining that one of his clients clients wanted to implant embryos into two different surrogates at the same time. He tells the camera several times that he thinks this is wrong, yet he's talked to two different surrogacy clinics and they both think it's a wonderful idea. They don't make it clear if he went through with the plan, but my bet is that he did.
There is no question that wanting to start a family when you can't is heartbreaking. I realize that not everyone has an extra $140K sitting around, but on the other hand, after seeing this show, I do not think I that I could, in good concise, hire one of these surrogates after seeing the exploitation and heartbreak that takes place.
Hopefully, I will never have to make that decision.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
The Sticky Vibes are Good...
Got my beta-3 integrin tests back today and they are positive. This is good and means that I have the "suction cups" that I need to hold the embies in safe-and-sound and there is no need for me to be on depo-lupron.
In a way, this is a relief because I certainly don't like being on drugs. On the other hand, I was hoping for some insight as to why this hasn't worked so far.
The nurse is anxious to move things along quickly and wants to get my drugs ordered this week.
As I have not cycled in the states before, I feel a bit like a guinea pig who is supposed to just do what the nice nurse tells her to do. I know that I will be put on birth-control pills when my cycle starts at the end of the month, but I have no idea what happens after that. I assumed that I would go straight on suppression hormones in August and the transfer would occur in mid-August, but now I think they have to get our two cycles synchronized.
So, we have one more shot for doing this on our own, naturally. A girl can dream, can't she?
In a way, this is a relief because I certainly don't like being on drugs. On the other hand, I was hoping for some insight as to why this hasn't worked so far.
The nurse is anxious to move things along quickly and wants to get my drugs ordered this week.
As I have not cycled in the states before, I feel a bit like a guinea pig who is supposed to just do what the nice nurse tells her to do. I know that I will be put on birth-control pills when my cycle starts at the end of the month, but I have no idea what happens after that. I assumed that I would go straight on suppression hormones in August and the transfer would occur in mid-August, but now I think they have to get our two cycles synchronized.
So, we have one more shot for doing this on our own, naturally. A girl can dream, can't she?
Sunday, July 4, 2010
The First Day of the Rest of Your Life
Today it seems appropriate to write a letter to our future kidlet(s), so here goes:
Dear Little Quant(s):
There will be many big days in your life coming up within these next several months, but today is one of the biggest because Dad and I finally chose the "helper" that will turn you from a deep longing in our hearts and a dream in our imaginations to a living, breathing, beautiful reality in our arms sometime in 2011.
XOXO,
Dear Little Quant(s):
There will be many big days in your life coming up within these next several months, but today is one of the biggest because Dad and I finally chose the "helper" that will turn you from a deep longing in our hearts and a dream in our imaginations to a living, breathing, beautiful reality in our arms sometime in 2011.
PICTURE REMOVED FOR CONFIDENTALITY
Why did we select this particular "helper"? Well, for many reasons, but some of the biggest are:
1. As you can see, we think she's absolutely adorable.
2. We wanted you to have the best chance of a lifetime of good health. Although past performance does not guarantee future results, her family history was stellar. She takes good care of herself and that's important to us.
3. Biologically, you already have 3 half-brothers and / or sisters somewhere, out there. The nurses tell us that she's a good mother to her current children and she wanted to help because she truly wanted to make a difference in a loving couple's lives to help them start a family.
4. She had a happy childhood with many friends and was close with her brothers and sisters. Again, family is important.
While you (and us) will probably never get to meet her, it's hard to come up with the words to thank her for the gift she is about to bestow on all of us.
Welcome to the frist day of the rest of your life!
Mom and Dad
Saturday, July 3, 2010
A Perfect Day
Ever have those days you wish you could re-live over and over, again and again? Well, today was one of those days...
Since I've never been to Rocky Mountain National Park, we decided that today was the day.
Dad got up early, grilled some chicken, packed a picnic lunch and we were off.
After a beautiful drive through Lyons we drove into Estes Park around 10:00 am. As we drove past the Stanley Hotel, it was just as I imagined - grand against a beautiful backdrop of mountains.
We entered the park around 10:30 am and spent the entire day driving through at our leisure - stopping along the way to do some short hikes. The weather couldn't have been better - the skies were deep cerulean and, even at the highest points (over 12,000 feet), the weather was in the 60's - almost a heat record!
We ate a picnic lunch of BBQ chicken, celery stuffed with soft cheese, crackers, and superbly-ripened strawberries by a beautiful lake (complete with birds and chipmunks - like living in a Disney movie) and hiked around the lake after lunch. Saw may large-horned deer and even a female moose.
Here are some pitures from our day (although the pictures just aren't like being there)...
On the way home, we drove thorugh Grande Lake and stopped in Winter Park to ride the "buckets" - a 2.5 minue train ride to a few quaint shops - and indulge in some delicious ice cream.
By the end of the day, we felt like this:
When we got home, we retreated to our upper balcony to watch the fireworks. We had a perfect view of the local fireworks, as well as a distant view of the fireworks downtown.
All in all, it really was a pefect day...
Since I've never been to Rocky Mountain National Park, we decided that today was the day.
Dad got up early, grilled some chicken, packed a picnic lunch and we were off.
After a beautiful drive through Lyons we drove into Estes Park around 10:00 am. As we drove past the Stanley Hotel, it was just as I imagined - grand against a beautiful backdrop of mountains.
We entered the park around 10:30 am and spent the entire day driving through at our leisure - stopping along the way to do some short hikes. The weather couldn't have been better - the skies were deep cerulean and, even at the highest points (over 12,000 feet), the weather was in the 60's - almost a heat record!
We ate a picnic lunch of BBQ chicken, celery stuffed with soft cheese, crackers, and superbly-ripened strawberries by a beautiful lake (complete with birds and chipmunks - like living in a Disney movie) and hiked around the lake after lunch. Saw may large-horned deer and even a female moose.
Here are some pitures from our day (although the pictures just aren't like being there)...
On the way home, we drove thorugh Grande Lake and stopped in Winter Park to ride the "buckets" - a 2.5 minue train ride to a few quaint shops - and indulge in some delicious ice cream.
By the end of the day, we felt like this:
When we got home, we retreated to our upper balcony to watch the fireworks. We had a perfect view of the local fireworks, as well as a distant view of the fireworks downtown.
All in all, it really was a pefect day...
Monday, June 28, 2010
Why Dr. Famous?
One question that gets asked often and that we put quite a bit of thought into was: Why did you choose Dr. Famous?
Let me answer that today...
As it was looking that our IVF in March would not be successful, it was recommended that we test the fetal tissue - so were referred to Dr. Paul Wexler. It was impossible not to adore Dr. Wexler the first time we met him! Dr. Wexler performs the chromosome testing for all the RE's in Colorado and knows them and all their practices very, very well.
He told us that the success rates of the top two clinics in Colorado were about the same (even though the most recent results were not published yet) - so we made appointments with both Dr's.
From the moment we entered the facility, we sensed that the egos of the Dr's at RE Office A were big - really, really big. Our "interview" confirmed this - as he bragged about his success rates and smirked when we asked about how he felt with regards to being aggressive with the stimulation hormones.
When we "interviewed" Dr. Famous, we had the exact opposite feeling. Although we knew he's extremely busy and was looking forward to finishing his day (it was after 5:30 pm and we were his last appointment), he took over an hour with us to answer our questions thoroughly. When we asked about testing the developing fetus to ensure it was absorbing the minerals and nutrients it needed to develop to be strong and healthy, he explained that technology was good, but that even he wasn't skilled enough to do a blood test on a developing fetus. So, although this was probably a very silly question in his mind, he took our inquiry seriously and did not talk down to us. We respected this.
Although we have always been practical when it comes to managing our finances and live below the lifestyle we can afford, we decided that having a good relationship with the doctor was critical and, although this is one of the most expensive places to cycle in the world, it was the right decision for us. While I am confident that the Dr. from Office A would have resulted in success too, we are extremely happy with our decision.
Let me answer that today...
As it was looking that our IVF in March would not be successful, it was recommended that we test the fetal tissue - so were referred to Dr. Paul Wexler. It was impossible not to adore Dr. Wexler the first time we met him! Dr. Wexler performs the chromosome testing for all the RE's in Colorado and knows them and all their practices very, very well.
He told us that the success rates of the top two clinics in Colorado were about the same (even though the most recent results were not published yet) - so we made appointments with both Dr's.
From the moment we entered the facility, we sensed that the egos of the Dr's at RE Office A were big - really, really big. Our "interview" confirmed this - as he bragged about his success rates and smirked when we asked about how he felt with regards to being aggressive with the stimulation hormones.
When we "interviewed" Dr. Famous, we had the exact opposite feeling. Although we knew he's extremely busy and was looking forward to finishing his day (it was after 5:30 pm and we were his last appointment), he took over an hour with us to answer our questions thoroughly. When we asked about testing the developing fetus to ensure it was absorbing the minerals and nutrients it needed to develop to be strong and healthy, he explained that technology was good, but that even he wasn't skilled enough to do a blood test on a developing fetus. So, although this was probably a very silly question in his mind, he took our inquiry seriously and did not talk down to us. We respected this.
Although we have always been practical when it comes to managing our finances and live below the lifestyle we can afford, we decided that having a good relationship with the doctor was critical and, although this is one of the most expensive places to cycle in the world, it was the right decision for us. While I am confident that the Dr. from Office A would have resulted in success too, we are extremely happy with our decision.
Saturday, June 26, 2010
It's 2 am on a Saturday...Great time to start a blog. Why not?
I've been thinking quite a bit lately about starting this blog to document my IVF journey and now just seemed like the perfect time. It's in the wee hours of the morning - a time I almost never see, the room is quiet and peaceful, my brown lab is fast asleep at the foot of the bed, and my mind is spinning with so many thoughts that I don't even know where to begin.
Oh, I do know! Let's begin with one of the most beautiful stories I've read in a long, long time (warning - have a BIG box of tissues within reach - especially if you're on hormones):
http://www.kellehampton.com/2010/01/nella-cordelia-birth-story.html
Powerful stuff, eh? Really changes your life perspective.
So, after 3 years of TTC, 4 failed IUI's, 2 rounds to remove polyps, 2 unsuccessful IVF's with donor eggs and 2 miscarriages, here we are - focosing on the positive and ready to move forward again.
Here we go...
Oh, I do know! Let's begin with one of the most beautiful stories I've read in a long, long time (warning - have a BIG box of tissues within reach - especially if you're on hormones):
http://www.kellehampton.com/2010/01/nella-cordelia-birth-story.html
Powerful stuff, eh? Really changes your life perspective.
So, after 3 years of TTC, 4 failed IUI's, 2 rounds to remove polyps, 2 unsuccessful IVF's with donor eggs and 2 miscarriages, here we are - focosing on the positive and ready to move forward again.
Here we go...