The past week has been one of the most amazing of my life. My DH and I have waited and dreamed so long for this day and I wasn't sure if it was ever going to happen. Sitting on this side of the fence - knowing that TWO tiny, incredible, wonderful lives are growing inside of me is a feeling I can't even begin to describe. I feel like I finally scaled my Everest!!!
Yes, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't exhausted, uncomfortable (although the rash has cleared up) and tired of being a pin-cushion / drug receptacle, but I still wake up with a smile on my face, a song in my heart and butterflies in my stomach. I haven't even seen any blood for a week (which for me is HUGE)!!!
Tomorrow I have my second u/s. Most women can't wait for u/s day, but I just want to stay right here in my own little world - enjoying every second of this ignorant bliss.
As with HCG's, the first thing I imagine most of us IVF women do is get on the beta board to see where we fall. How do we compare to the statistics? Each time we get another number - HCG, P4, E2 or a heartbeat, the logical side of me tries to gather as much info as possible and interpret the statistics. Yes, my doctor says my P4 should be X but most women's were Y and Z, are they not telling me something? What is a "good heartbeat" number and when can I start to feel comfortable that these LO's are here to stay?
I am starting to run low on some of my drugs and contacted my nurse earlier this week. She told me to re-order one prescription, but said that we are going to start weaning me off the drugs soon and I shouldn't need to refill any others.
I am scared - what if they miscalculate? What if my body doesn't start creating the hormones like it's supposed to?
Please, don't take away my security blankie...can't I just stay in this state of ignorant bliss awhile longer?
3 comments:
Oh, Flygirl... thinking of you. I truly hope that those two babies are thriving and the bleeding is just from that stupid SCH. Rest assured that those nurses would not screw this up for you and won't wean until your body can handle it!
Flygirl...relax...all of us are EXACTLY like you for the first tri. I think if I recall correctly (again please google this) but I think a good heartbeat at 8 weeks gestation is between 120 - 160 bpm. If you get ANY heartbeat at 6 weeks that's also a great sign...majority start by week 7 (between week 5.5 and week 7). As for your hormone levels...again...its so tough to trust them we found this tough. But they are the experts. At one point you have to let them be in the driver's seat. Easier said than done but try your best to enjoy this bliss! You have indeed climbed the top of Mt. Everest and the trek down is equally challenging. One step at a time!!
hey just lovin seeing you happy. don't know much about the drugs and levels but I'm digging seeing you so deservingly happy.
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